oh, people:

i just got back from the little b & b grocery store in sour lake; i brought my own nylon bag up to the checkout and the woman laughed in my face -- " you want me to put your stuff in that?"

me, today:

here is me, with my new hair, sitting in front of the fire and sneering at the snuggie commercial that just came on the television (my parents and i are watching 'caribbean cops' [who even knew this show existed? it's awful.] in our pajamas). i got about five inches cut off, plus layers, but somehow it doesn't look like that much to everyone else. anyway, no knot-buns anymore!

it was hot yesterday, but a coldfront came through last night and now it's feeling wonderfully wintery here. i love christmastime in sour lake.

iiiiiiiii:

am getting a haircut tomorrow morning!!!

not my day:

i slept poorly last night; this morning i was woken up at 6:41 by a phone call from my mother, who wanted to tell me all about the snow in college station; i had coffee jitters during my spanish final at 10:30, which i may or may not have passed; i spilled the remaining coffee all over my leather backpack and kitchen table a few hours later; etc.

now i'm drinking a (stout) screwdriver and watching 'love actually' and frantically working on my watercolor final -- a triptych -- that i began at 7:45 pm and that is due at 10:40 tomorrow morning. sounds classy, right?

christmas shopping:

i'm pretty low on funds to spend on extravagant christmas gifts this year, but i love browsing around on the internet nonetheless, finding sweet, handmade, interesting gifts that i would give to my friends and family if i were financially capable of doing so. for instance:
also, i came across this website -- gosucculent.com -- where you can pick out beautiful, exotic succulents and cactuses and have them shipped to you!

know of any get-rich-quick schemes?

a confession:

i finished two books today. which, in itself, isn't terrible, until i consider how much painting i could have accomplished in the time that i spent reading, or how many dishes i could have washed or miles i could have run... and then i realize it's pretty bad.

also, autumn is fantastic. i can't shut up about how beautiful each and every leaf on each and every tree is. i've tried. ask bradley.

world:

are you ending?

rainy monday:

casey and i stayed in bed this morning for a bit longer than we had planned, enjoying the overcast sky and the rain and the comfy warmth, and then we looked at maps of south america over coffee and yogurt.

also, i know that it's technically too early to be listening to christmas music... but the vince guaraldi trio's 'a charlie brown christmas' seemed like the perfect thing to listen to as i got ready for class on this chilly, rainy morning. i may be listening to it on a pretty regular basis beginning today. so, sorry guys.

dummy:

i tripped over a jagged piece of sidewalk on my run this morning, scraping up my right elbow (see photo below), banging up my left knee, and bruising my right hip bone and left thumb (right on the pad; a weird spot for a big purple bruise) during the fall. i felt like a huge dummy, but more than that, i was in a lot of pain. i blubbered all the way home, and sobbed as i tried to take my clothes off to get in the shower, and cried some more when i found a first aid kit with my cleaning supplies but couldn't bend my elbow to tape the gauze in the right place, and kept whimpering in bed until bradley came over an hour later and told me to stop being a baby.i'm feeling better now, but anticipating a bloody bandage and sore limbs for a few days, and hopefully some sweet bruises and scars later.

whatever you do:

don't look at all of the status updates on facebook. i just spent about five minutes doing so, and all of the bullshit about the election made me lose a little bit of faith in humanity. people referring to candidates as if they were football teams. other people thinking that they can change their friends' opinions this close to election day with a few malicious words about the opposition. come on, be civil already.

bakin' on a wednesday night:

this evening i finished a book, painted for two hours, cleaned my kitchen and baked some vegan pumpkin muffins. at 10:30 pm. i couldn't help myself. the photo may not be so great, but it smells pretty amazing in here.

a moth:

this is a moth that sat on bradley's windowsill all yesterday afternoon while i read and bradley drew, until shaq came in and scared him away.

miscellany:

an old zen saying (from this movie, which i watched this evening):

"if you have a little piece of shit on your nose, everything stinks."

& some interesting facts about coffee vs. tea.

what if:

i just let my hair keep on growing and growing and growing?
yeek!

sea stone vases:

by mitsuru koga, found here. aren't they beautiful?

i feel the need to apologize for posting so much lately... like i'm clogging up the internet... but i'm just feeling so inspired!

things in my kitchen:

yesterday we had homemade vegan pizza margherita. i honestly thought that bradley was going to break down and cry -- he was so proud of his near-perfect dough. (it was really, really nice dough. and delicious pizza.)

i've put off washing my dishes all day long; i consolidated the mess by stacking plates and bowls, and i was pleased with the unexpectedly appealing sight of the arrangement in my kitchen sink.

somewhere there's a feather:

um. guys, i can't stop listening to nico.

a nice series:

"the man on the roof," a guy who takes pictures of himself modeling women's bikini bottoms on the roof of a ymca in the late sixties and early seventies.

snippets of last night's dreams:

-bradley was really drunk and hanging out with some other girl (who was also drunk). he got into an accident on his bicycle -- there was a lot of blood, but he just had a few scratches on his upper thigh (also, his cut-offs were way shorter than usual). the girl dragged him out of the road to the sidewalk. i watched all of this from the other side of the road and i worried about him, but for some reason i couldn't cross the street to help. after he had cleaned up a bit, he started talking with my uncle terry, who was sitting in a dark corner of a crowded party. that's where i found him. i sat down with him and he put his head on my shoulder.

-i kept walking past mirrors and catching glimpses of really dark hair on my upper lip, and i panicked.

-i drank ligon's chocolate silk straight from the carton that's in her fridge (i'm staying at her house in lubbock right now, and there really is a carton of chocolate silk in her fridge); i chugged it until there was only one sip left in the carton (probably all backwash), at which point i said, unapologetically, "here ligon. there are a few drops left." and then i woke up.

favorites:

one of my favorite things to do is to pick up interesting little bits of flora that i find on the ground. acorns, magnolia seedpods, twigs, nuts, etc. i put my findings in a little turquoise ceramic bowl on my kitchen table. this is one such thing that i've found recently:
and this is another:

my friday morning:

an early 2-mile jog;
two cups of coffee;
a spanish test;
an aggressive hum and the fresh smell of cut grass;
a patch of sunlight;
a good book (i joined the denton public library system yesterday).

this is the sight that i've been waking up to lately, at about seven o'clock in the morning. the orange glow is really much more vibrant than my little camera can capture:

stressed, anxious, hungry:

i've been feeling stressed and anxious all day, so i just spent 40 minutes doing yoga in my living room (complete with a soothing soundtrack) and 20 minutes walking around my neighborhood in the drizzle (which was graced by a little peek of sunshine, the first all day) to relieve my stress and anxiety, but i'm still feeling stressed and anxious. and now hungry.

do you know about lovebugs?:

i feel that they're an important aspect of life in southeast texas. they have a distinct smell -- not necessarily a pleasant one -- and a distinct association -- with summer -- in my mind.

it's lovebug season in full force down here. lovebugs are everywhere: floating around, clinging to hair and clothes and bare skin, hanging around the threshold of every door, hundreds and hundreds smashed on the front of each auto on the road, copulating all the while.

i just read about them a bit here; quite interesting.

one potato:

last night i dreamt of potato stamps. remember those from elementary school? i haven't a clue what i could have seen or done that would trigger my brain to lug that old, faded memory out of its archives. anyway, does anyone want to join me in a nostalgic craft project sometime?

also, i've listened to beach house's 'devotion' all the way through about five times today.

new, nothing new:

i'm always sleepy,
and i want to go camping!

things that i noticed on my run this evening:

two tree trunks, intertwined;
an unnamed alleyway;
a cluster of hedge apples on a patch of bright green grass;
an old, discarded shoe-stretcher;
virgin mary figurines resting on a rusty window unit.

(if nothing else is working out for me right now, at least i'm feeling a bit healthier every day, and simultaneously memorizing the subtle details in the houses and the sidewalks and the trees of my new neighborhood.)

right now:

it's raining outside; there is a loud, irregular drip on the ledge outside of my living room window. also, there is a more constant sound of dripping coming from my kitchen, as my broken faucet leaks into a dirty pot in the sink.

the two sounds combined are making me feel crazy.

also:

i'm currently reading 'the facts behind the helsinki roccamatios' by yann martel, which chronicles a young man's struggle with aids and his friend's struggle to distract him from his inevitable death.

coincidentally, this evening i came across leroy sievers' blog, 'my cancer', where the journalist documents his personal battle against the disease. he passed away a few days ago, and i'm reading it backwards. his entries are so striking and concise, about the little ways in which his life changes as cancer slowly takes over his body. so beautiful and sad.

ghost cat:

i'll miss you forever, baby boy.

i don't understand:

why looking at other people's lives and belongings is so enthralling. sometimes i feel like a borderline stalker.

found:

came across these while looking through iphoto on bailey's old laptop. both from summer 2006.

can't stop, won't stop:

last night i got back from a week in california; this afternoon i leave for a long weekend in pleasure island with my parents. i feel like summer is almost over.

cooking:

one good thing about spending the summer at home with my parents is that i've been able to practice my cooking -- and teach them how to make healthy dinners without meat. i've made curried vegetables, gazpacho soup, fresh pastas with homemade pesto, etc. etc. also, mom and i have been combining our efforts lately: last tuesday it was tortilla española, fresh tomato salad with vinaigrette, and mojitos; tonight it was grilled fish tacos with pico de gallo, roasted corn, red cabbage, creamy guacamole, and watermelon margaritas (recipes from the current issue of domino magazine). delicious.

tomorrow i leave for san francisco at 6 a.m. i'm excited about seeing and doing a number of things while i'm there...

i love:

the new portishead album. it has been stuck in my head all month, and i listened to it all last week in belize on my ipod while i laid on the sand and watched these really pretty and eerie frigatebirds float above me, and it's pretty much all i've listened to in my car since i bought the c.d. back in may. i think that it's probably affecting my entire outlook on life.

some things:

this is a neat leaf that i found in my parents' backyard:
and this is a video of mom and bailey bicycling to work:

routine:

i get up early, i have coffee and breakfast, sit around for a while, get dressed. i prepare lunch, mom and i ride our bicycles 1.4 miles to work. i work until 5 p.m., we ride our bicycles 1.4 miles home. i think about unpacking my car and straightening up my room. i run, i shower. i help with dinner and drink a few glasses of wine. i read, and i go to bed early.

so if you're curious: this will be my summer. plus a vacation here and there. it's not so bad, so far.

tonight:

is the first time that i've felt "alone" in a while. it's probably because i have an almost-completely-empty apartment (besides a few boxes of cleaning supplies and an overnight bag) and a big, queen-sized air mattress all to myself (and maribelle) for the first time in over a week.

tomorrow morning i leave austin for good. it's such a weird feeling -- i'll miss the city and my friends and the springs and the food and my way of life, of course, but i'm glad to move on. and i've been ready for a while.

so i'm looking forward to a summer of travel and self-betterment, and an autumn in a completely different place.

(a few new photos on flickr.)

yoga:

my little, cramped apartment has been much too uncomfortable to practice yoga in and this, combined with the cancellation of my gym membership, has caused me to almost completely abandon my practice over the past ten months or so.

but yesterday morning my parents took home most of the furniture from my living room and kitchen, so now i have a big (um, not very big), open space in my apartment to lay out my mat.

i just pulled out my deck of yoga cards and stretched for a solid 45 minutes. it felt so, so, so wonderful. i'm getting excited about picking it up again, and about perhaps starting a weekly (or bi-weekly? or tri-weekly?) pick-up yoga session on the lawn across from 715 in the fall.

hmm. what on earth would the neighbors think if we practiced naked?

birthday:

thanks to all of my wonderful friends who made my birthday a great one by sending me surprises in the mail, partying with me on saturday night, or making/finding/giving me beautiful things. i'm such a lucky girl. i love you all.

dents:

one by one the seasons change you
maybe once but not for all
time can't paint the picture for you
dying leaves need time to fall

i can't stop listening to this song on repeat.

i was at hippie fest with my parents all weekend. wonderful weather, beautiful music, delicious beer, hula hooping, etc. my birthday is this week, and only a few weeks remain until the end of school, and i'm happy and restless.

bald:

last night i had a weird dream. i had to explain the meaning of the word "bald" to an older guy who didn't speak very good english. we were playing scrabble or something. and he was going bald and trying to hide his receding hairline, so it was sort of awkward. other weird stuff happened in this dream, too, but i don't remember any of it now.

also, bailey took me to see feist for my birthday. it was wonderful.

busy:

busy busy busy busy busy busy busy busy busy.

beach boys:

i wonder whether the guys dressed in matching outfits even to go to the grocery store. and whether they picked up any ladies this way.

i'm hungover.

treehouse:

today began with a loud hail storm, and has developed in to a beautiful, cool, cloudless day; i have spent the better part of it in my nightgown, on my bed, with the window open, reading a book, and i feel like i'm sitting in puddle of light in a treehouse. it's lovely.

room please:

Im Moving Soon To Austin And I Need A Room,,Im 36,Non Drugs, Non Drink And Non Smoke,,I Lead A Clean Life With No Drama,I Went Thew A Very Bad Divorce In Indiana And Need To Get Back On My Feet.Im Very Handy And Can Work On Anything,,I Do My Own Cleaning Cooking And Laundry.And I Have A Great Postive Outlook On Life,If Some One Could Please Help It Would Be Great,,God Bless And Have A Great Day,,Michael

i'm looking at craigslist to find someone to take over my lease for the summer, and i'm coming across some pretty funny 'housing wanted' ads.

ps. apparently this is my 100th post.

photos:

today i picked up the holga photos i took in switzerland. i'm pretty happy about the way that some of them came out. look here.
also today, i'm doing the lemon juice/maple syrup/cayenne pepper/water cleanse. i'm not hungry, but i really, really want to eat something solid. i should really do it for longer than one day to receive the desired results, but i won't last. i'm dreaming of cooking some chik'n and hericot verts for dinner. mmm.

absolutely no self control.

this week:

has been one of the longest of my life.

grass whistlin':

blah:

so i'm back from switzerland. it was a wonderful trip which, unfortunately, didn't get the travel-urge out of my system, but intensified the itch. i feel like i need to get going again already, before my backpack is completely unloaded. a road trip, anyone?

springtime happened while i was away, or at least began its infiltration, and new green leaves were a nice thing to come home to. i can't wait for warm (but not too warm), sunny days. and barton springs. and snow cones and suntans.

today in my memoir class, we workshopped a personal essay i wrote about my grandfather. i've been having anxiety attacks and nervous stomachaches in anticipation of this class session for three weeks. but i made it through with just a hot (and blushing) face and a shaky hand to reveal my unease. i received a lot of positive feedback, which was surprising, relieving, and flattering. one lady commented that i should publish. yeaaaah. anyway, i'm feeling a lot better now.

bye.

suiza:

i'm going nuts trying to get everything done before thursday; but this time next week, i will be either here,or here. i mean, no big deal.

day twenty-nine:

goodbye, beautiful february!

day twenty-eight:

bloody orangey!

day twenty-seven:

there were a number of things that i meant to do today but never got around to: getting a head start on a few essays, going for a run, voting early, attending a career and internship fair, seeing bill clinton speak on campus. instead, i took a nap in a spot of sun on my bed, looked through some books on switzerland, and went to dinner with a friend; now i'm drinking wine out of my owl cup and thinking about what to pack for denton.

day twenty-six:

jesus christ, i'm so in love with devendra banhart. apparently mb is pretty into him, too. (thanks to darcy for posting this link on monét's facebook, which reminded me how dreamy he is, which, in turn, reminded me how talented he is. currently listening to cripple crow.)

day twenty-five:

today felt like summer; i ate lots of blueberries.

day twenty-four:

i drove my chinese neighbor to class on friday, and today she returned the favor by giving me a small package of tea that she brought back here from her winter trip to china. i can't wait to drink it!

day twenty-three:

pic-nic!

day twenty-two:

last minute.

day twenty-one:

day twenty:

today was laundry day and camera-has-a-dead-battery day, so this is a photo from last night at dinner, where i ate some delicious fish tacos.

day nineteen:

long day, beautiful day.

day eighteen:

i came home from class today to find maribelle limping around, favoring her back leg. i spent $85 at the vet for them to tell me that they couldn't tell me what was wrong. cool. at least the baby got a little shot out of the deal.

day seventeen:

day sixteen:

them denton girls are here!

day fifteen:

so sleepy and lazy today. i only just changed out of my pajamas.

day fourteen:

i could sleep through valentine's day and be perfectly happy. damn it all.

but this card from my big sister is cuuute.

day thirteen:

ate out at shady grove tonight. i'm bored.

day twelve:

maribelle has an obsession with my bathtub; i will never understand.

day eleven:

today i wore sandals and took two naps. so what?

day ten:

a sink, not mine.

day nine:

my parents and i hung out on south congress all afternoon. this creepy little baby reminded me of maribelle.
p.s. - i want to apologize to everyone i kissed last night, and also those who i neglected to kiss. i love you all.

day eight:

i am so in love with casey and so in love with her tepee.

day seven:

i'm in denton! this is the view from bradley's window at 5:55 pm. i like the birdies.

day six:

an accidental photo of the afternoon shadows on my lampshade.

day five:

my early lunch: a berry-banana smoothie and a bowlful of almonds. i'm pretending like i don't have a paper due tomorrow by listening to the beach boys and reading a tabloid about heath ledger's life and death.