a puzzle:

last night over dinner (peas, chicken strips, & lightly fried potatoes; we're scrimping for food, refusing to go to the grocery store until it is absolutely necessary), carmen & i discussed our recent, previously unspoken infatuation with crossword puzzles. it's true: the past few weeks the three of us have been stocking up on newspapers, making a habit of working on crosswords together over lunch, or leaving the puzzles on the kitchen table, unfinished, for the next person to complete at her leisure.

the puzzle that we worked on yesterday evening was particularly tough. i gave up at least three times, kept going back, & ended up leaving the uppermost left block unfinished overnight. i think that the incompletion spurred this dream:

a group of students at a college were to make a crossword puzzle for a newspaper. the puzzle was published. i attempted to complete it; i just knew that the answer to 10 across had to be something or another, i can't remember what, but it just wouldn't fit because there weren't enough blank squares. it turns out that the puzzle was un-completeable!! a joke! a trick!

anyhow, i woke up this morning frustrated about this situation, but with the answer to 6 down on the tip of my tongue: "idols!" i dashed (or shuffled, rather; it was early) to the kitchen & penciled it in.

i must put an end to this obsession. it is kind of ruining my life.

thanks a lot:

in light of the upcoming holiday, i realize that i have much to be thankful for. great friends, amazing family. my health. however, i also have much to be thankless about: upcoming papers & exams, for example. anxiety regarding these assignments hits me in waves; i have recurring hot-flashes & a constant sinking stomach.

so, two weeks to complete three papers (totaling 25 pages all together), one analytical outline (10 pages), one spanish cultural presentation (to last 15 minutes), & one final exam. putting it down in numbers like this didn't help the situation as i thought it might. such an overwhelming undertaking. i'm going to stop bitching now & get to work.

blue:

blueberries taste like christmas trees!

the cold(ish) weather is finally here. hopefully he will take a load off, have a cup of tea, remain with us for a while.

loco:

the wind is blowing very hard outside today, & i am afraid that my house may fall down.

meanwhile, scientists at the university of ankara in turkey "proved that listening to disco turned pigs deaf and made mice homosexual." (from shapiro, turn the beat around: the secret history of disco)

lately:

i feel as if i am moving too quickly in no particular direction.